{"id":872,"date":"2014-07-15T07:10:01","date_gmt":"2014-07-15T07:10:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.talkinggrid.com\/dev\/?p=872"},"modified":"2014-07-15T07:10:01","modified_gmt":"2014-07-15T07:10:01","slug":"dr-daniel-e-branagan-mi-padre-ideal-dad","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/dr-daniel-e-branagan-mi-padre-ideal-dad\/","title":{"rendered":"Dr. Daniel E. Branagan; Mi Padre was an Ideal Dad"},"content":{"rendered":"

A few days after Father\u2019s Day\u2026. I\u2019m thinking of my father.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve written about him and our close connection before. \u00a0Read\u00a0Dr. Daniel E. Branagan; Mi Padre was an Ideal Dad,\u00a0if you like…<\/strong><\/p>\n

Since his death, I\u2019ve grown closer to my father. \u00a0I have come to idealize him. \u00a0He is a Saint, now. \u00a0He visits me, with advice, when I need his support. \u00a0An attorney in Dominican Republic, whose political\/professional ambitions were thwarted, destined to\u00a0failure. \u00a0(He was naive, a firm believer in the goodness of man, his fellows, in the LAW, as a force toward good\u2026 redemption. \u00a0He believed in THE SYSTEM, jails in his mind, served to\u00a0\u201crehabilitate some\u2026\u201d Thus, \u00a0he voted conservatively.) \u00a0I admire him, never-the-less for his lofty ambitions and solid morality. \u00a0He cared. \u00a0He demonstrated and proved a fierce, attentive, love for me as a little person.
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

Toward the end of his life, my father went HOME. \u00a0He went back to his\u00a0\u201cpeople.\u201d \u00a0He choose to avoid traditional medical care until the cancer had spread. \u00a0It was too late when he tried. \u00a0(Santo Domingo, the capital of Dominican Republic, has excellent doctors and offers excellent medical care at much less out-of-pocket-cost than in the United States.) \u00a0 I believe he died in relative peace, even though I was not at his bedside. \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

I saw him a few months before he died. \u00a0I traveled through dimensions, as one does when going from one culture to another, to his\u00a0heimat<\/a>. \u00a0But it was more than just a trip into a world I am a part of yet\u2026 I\u2019ve not been there much in the last twenty years. \u00a0I grew up visiting Santo Dominigo. \u00a0During summer vacations, we\u2019d go and stay with my mother\u2019s family, in their old home, which is no longer in the family, it exists but the whole neighborhood around it was demolished in order to make room for progress. \u00a0The old fashioned, brightly painted, tin-roofed and wooden homes, that decorated the neighborhood, were a “fire\u00a0hazard, “and impossible to standardize. \u00a0Whole neighborhoods,\u00a0middle-class\u00a0barrios<\/em>\u00a0vanished. \u00a0Yet, the city keeps growing, moving forward. \u00a0You don\u2019t see street kids, looking to shoe-shine or beg a little change for their families, anymore. \u00a0The government did\u00a0something<\/em>, schools, I think. I tried to move there, once. \u00a0My father was living there, but he had a woman\u2026 he did not even like her all-that-much, he complained about her ignorance, or lack of interest in\u00a0Mayan Codexes<\/a>\u00a0which are housed in the\u00a0Faro a Colon<\/a>\u00a0,<\/a>a whole sad \u00a0monument to, of-all-unfashionable-people, Christopher Columbus. \u00a0He had no room in his mature, attempts at establishing his dream life, his public unfolding, his grand success for a twenty-something and lost, me.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Columbus, curiously enough\u00a0\u201cdiscovered,\u201d Santo Domingo and made it his base of operations. \u00a0He lived there and governed until his brother took over. \u00a0Descendants of the family are still active members of Dominican Society. \u00a0We are the oldest city in the New World, with the oldest church, university, and infrastructure. \u00a0We had a powerful dictator for a long time, which means we have working roads, a functional telephone system, and a very stable society; despite unrest, poverty, and other ills (which plague all nations, except the northern European societies which benefit from their government\u2019s former exploitation of colonies and slave trading, generations ago. \u00a0Wealth, being a\u00a0\u201ccivilizing,\u201d factor.). \u00a0Today, Thursday, 24 April 2014 Frau Kolb types, from a, “centered quiet place within,” having slept well, dreamt of nothing\u2026 passed out from a day fulfilling obligations, duties.<\/p>\n

What do you do that you don\u2019t want to do, really? \u00a0What fills you with dread until it is behind you and then you realize that it isn\u2019t\u00a0so bad<\/em>?<\/p>\n

Well, for me\u2026 sometimes, my children\u2019s school projects, deadlines, homework, teacher conferences, meetings\u2026 Oh! \u00a0It is all too much. \u00a0I get really stressed out. \u00a0I have to buy poster board! \u00a0Tape! \u00a0Do this. \u00a0Do that. \u00a0Help! \u00a0Now, I see\u2026\u00a0why<\/em>\u00a0my mother never went to school to talk to my teachers. \u00a0My father did when I was little. \u00a0When he could\u2026 when he wasn\u2019t working, selling furniture in Manhattan,\u00a0New York City<\/a>. \u00a0He worked, a lot. \u00a0He studied law, earned an attorney\u2019s title and thought he\u2019d take his NEW WIFE to America, like she wanted, for six months\u2014get loaded\u2014 and be able to set themselves and her four little ones; in their home nation, Dominican Republic, in the Spanish speaking capital, first city of the New World, home to\u00a0Christopher Columbus<\/a>, and his clan:\u00a0Santo Domingo<\/a>. \u00a0Of course, six months after arriving in New York City, they had long ago worn out the middle class digs where they dropped as friends of family for the first few weeks and had passed to less comfortable accommodations, incurring debt along the way. \u00a0(They had a\u00a0duty<\/em>\u00a0to send money home.)<\/p>\n

The first job my father took in the United States was as a dishwasher in a restaurant. \u00a0It broke his proud heart, yet he took the position. \u00a0He was punctual, attentive, and compliant; a better dishwasher doing a better job, rinse, and repeat. \u00a0Shortly, there after, he had a better gig in a nicer spot; always\u2026 punctual, attentive, compliant; like his parents, descendant of African slaves brought to the Caribbean, imported to St. Croix\u2026 part of an Anglo-Irish household of prominence; as domestics\u2026 house slaves, virtually\u2026 yet, English speakers.<\/p>\n

My father\u2019s accented English was faultless. \u00a0He spoke it with flare and taught me to, \u201calways carry a book with me,\u201d after teaching me to read, at home so that by age three, I was very good at it. \u00a0Then he taught me to play chess\u2026 that was fun, beating old men, playing in the park; a five year old girl in a handmade cotton dress with pink satin bows decorating her flat little chest\u2026 quickly executing a \u201ccheck mate!\u201d \u00a0Her father, laughingly\u2026 collecting cash.<\/p>\n

When I was a kid, growing up in Manhattan, I could always call my Daddy at work, on 14th Street near Union Station where he was the top salesman on the floor. \u00a0He\u2019d always answer, taking my after school calls, with glee in his voice. \u00a0 My father advised me, \u201cWatch people. \u00a0Their bodies never lie. \u00a0Their intentions are always clear in their eyes, on their faces\u2026 you will see what they are thinking IF you look carefully enough. \u00a0They will call you a Mind Reader… I see the ones that come in with the intention to buy and I facilitate their transactions. I provide guidance, information, and encouragement. I sell.\u201d \u00a0He would contrast himself to the, \u201cyoung and inexperienced,\u201d salespeople that would, \u201cjump on everybody walking in; wasting their energy and leaving the real business of furniture sales to me. Hah!\u201d \u00a0He\u2019d laugh. \u00a0I\u2019d admire his thunder. \u00a0He was amazing so black, tall, fit like a knight; always ready for a challenge; thus, he died loving my mother.<\/p>\n

\u201cPeople\u2026\u201d my Dad would explain, \u201cLove walking into stores; just to LOOK\u2026 that is why they call it a furniture gallery\u2026 they can\u2019t afford or don\u2019t want to buy\u2026 ignore these people and they will be thankful for it.\u201d \u00a0Yet, \u201cCostumers are clients\u2026 ignore these people and well, not only will you not have a job for long, it isn\u2019t fun selling furniture if you don\u2019t DO IT.\u201d and then he would look down at me sternly and say, \u201cAnd… you know, Cari\u2026 most people can\u2019t really afford good furniture. \u00a0They can\u2019t afford a sandwich for a girl on date-night, my Dear. \u00a0They don\u2019t understand that money flows whenever and wherever it wills\u2026 we just have to be there to get our share.” \u00a0Work! \u00a0Pay attention. \u00a0Read. \u00a0Write. \u00a0Bike ride. \u00a0Walk. \u00a0Repeat.<\/p>\n

He trained me well to think, and thus fulfilled his duty; providing for me and equipping me with people reading and sales skills; teaching me to pay attention to others as a means of fulfilling my own needs, \u201cgoing with the flow,\u201d of money\u2026 instead of against it\u2026 he taught me to swim the high seas of responsibility and come ashore today with pride.<\/p>\n

Hah!<\/p>\n

Thank you, Dad.<\/p>\n

Loving Thursday,<\/p>\n

Frau K.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A few days after Father\u2019s Day\u2026. I\u2019m thinking of my father.\u00a0 I\u2019ve written about him and our close connection before. \u00a0Read\u00a0Dr. Daniel E. Branagan; Mi Padre was an Ideal Dad,\u00a0if you like… Since his death, I\u2019ve grown closer to my father. \u00a0I have come to idealize him. \u00a0He is a Saint, now. \u00a0He visits me, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":873,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[22,26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-872","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cultural-commentary","category-health-spiritual-fitness"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/MP900407459.jpg?fit=1280%2C853&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/872","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=872"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/872\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":874,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/872\/revisions\/874"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/873"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=872"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=872"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=872"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}