{"id":798,"date":"2014-07-15T01:52:34","date_gmt":"2014-07-15T01:52:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.talkinggrid.com\/dev\/?p=798"},"modified":"2014-07-15T02:16:58","modified_gmt":"2014-07-15T02:16:58","slug":"23-cancer-blessings-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/23-cancer-blessings-2\/","title":{"rendered":"23 More Cancer Blessings"},"content":{"rendered":"

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\u201cPowerful Selfie,\u201d at LACMA, 2010, here Frau Kolb is sporting her \u201cBritish House Wife Wig.\u201d Dig it?<\/h6>\n

Cancer Blessings?<\/p>\n

How dare Frau Kolb suggest that the cancer might mean an end to your precious life is a blessing?<\/p>\n

Well, Frau Kolb is an expert on getting a kick out of whatever life throws up in the way of enjoying life. I am NOT, however a doctor, what you read here is my personal proposal, an invitation, if you will, to join me in celebrating the good and bad news, as good and bad news will bloom in your life like flowers in the spring time.<\/p>\n

Here are 23 More Cancer Blessings for you. Enjoy!<\/h3>\n

24.) Self care is central to success in coping with any major crisis. This is really the time to pamper yourself. So… ramp-up your bath routine. Bath oils, salts, candles, lotions, scrub-brushes, and abrasive bathing gloves. None of it is \u201cexpensive,\u201d really but when you really get going you can make a very nice day of being in the tub, especially as you undergo treatment.<\/p>\n

25.) Learn something totally unrelated to your new condition. Focus on learning Italian, for example. You always wanted to learn French. This is the moment to go to the public library and take out the Farsi tapes or the Swahili. What would you like to learn? Investing yourself in picking up NEW skills will give you strength to face this new reality.<\/p>\n

27.) Plan a no-expense spared trip around the world for yourself. Of course, you won\u2019t go. Yet, you will really think about the trip. How you would travel\u2026 Where you would visit\u2026 The schedules of luxury cruise ships are available on-line; image yourself in the Penthouse Suite, if this appeals to you. If not\u2026 are you backpacking in the Andes? Tell me, where will you go? Read guide books and learn about what to expect when you arrive. The trip should be long and lavish. This is so much more pleasant to focusing on the HORROR the HORROR of treatment.<\/p>\n

28.) Throw a PAR-TAY! Yes, I\u2019m talking disco lights in the bathroom.<\/p>\n

29.) Soon, you will have access to heavy duty pain medications. Take it slow! Follow directions. But, we gotta be grateful that they exist. They work better than a mallet to knock you OUT for a restful night of much needed sleep. When it really hurts, thank goodness, for Vicodin! Do not abuse your medications. Yet, use them to help you leap across the parts too far from ease to be healthy. In other words, don\u2019t suck up the pain, take a prescribed pill when you require it.<\/p>\n

30.) If you live where it is legally available, Medical Marijuana works for nausea and other \u201cchronic,\u201d conditions. It may also help with mood swings and depression, just request the right strains. There are strains, \u201cIndicas,\u201d that put you right \u201cheavy,\u201d state for sleep and other strains, \u201cSativas,\u201d that help stamina, creativity, and giggles. You no longer have to smoke, the aroma(s) offends, because they have a wide variety of edible: tea, honey, candies, bagel chips, and lemonades infused with THC and immune boosting CBD. Try it only if you feel comfortable with the idea. I LOVE it because it makes me feel like a naughty teen to take a bong hit in my boudoir. Anyway\u2026 you might find you like the staff at the dispensaries. (They tend to hire very cute and upbeat people as \u201cbud-tenders.”)<\/p>\n

31.) Don\u2019t just cut the cancer out, radiate it, take the chemo: do what you must. Do it fast. Do not hesitate because everyday counts. Cancers are not full of pity. They will eat you, because Honey, YOU are delicious! Embrace the rigors of radical treatment as long as you can and IF your condition is beyond bad\u2026 well take your meds, Champagne, and let Oscar Wilde and Dorothy Parker get the table ready for you when you hit the perpetual dinner party in the sky, do it with panache.<\/p>\n

32.) You picked the best doctors or you are getting the best care you can from your less-than-ideal yet qualified, expert, respected, and good looking doctors, personal advocate, and entourage of fashionable, sexy, people. IF you did not put together the perfect care team for yourself, remember that as long as you live you can always make changes. Always. All you have to do is use your words, ask nice, play fair, and be sweet on change to get it.<\/p>\n

Side note:<\/h3>\n

IF you find yourself totally alone, ask yourself \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/strong> The answer must be: you. What have you done or failed to do to win the respect and love of others? Are you selfish? Are you self centered? Did you fail to maintain, through constant reciprocation your friendships? Are you simply mentally ill? OK! FINE! Know that whoever and where-ever you are you are worthy of love and if you allow yourself to connect with the universal reserve of good vibes, sometimes called \u201cGod,\u201d other times, \u201cGoodness,\u201d and yet other times, \u201cMother Mary… Shiva… or whatever deity you subscribe to… if atheism is your bag, well LOVE it… because that is a religion, too… you have to do plenty of selective experiencing not to see the intelligence, joy, sparkle, that is everywhere where life nests… Because this is a time when YOU can make a change in the energy around you by being caring to the people that are around you. Let LOVE be the NEW YOU and your last day will be a lovely one. Be available and services will be provided. Remember: attracting good energy to your life requires determination on your part in that you must be willing to be and accept the kindness of others, as function of how you behave, yourself.<\/p>\n

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Another daring NEW (Cancer) LOOK! \u00a0Here Frau Kolb wears her, \u201cGhetto Fabulous,\u201d Two-Tone wig. \u00a0Dig it?<\/h6>\n

33.) If you are alone.\u00a0 Face it.\u00a0 Find company within and books will sustain you.\u00a0 Joy is possible, I\u2019m sure, even for vegan straight-edge atheists with no family and no pets. \u00a0Maybe misanthropes can find strength in solitude. \u00a0I commend anyone that can find pleasure in who they are, what they have, where they are\u2026 It doesn\u2019t matter IF you are a person undergoing extreme cancer therapy; you can still laugh between the vomit bouts. \u00a0For example: my best friend, the tall skinny spike healed wearing Italian-American, Los Angeles, bombshell, I told you about in the first 23 Cancer Blessings<\/a>, also underwent cancer treatment. \u00a0She was invited to a party at the Playboy mansion and she went, bald but looking ravishing, she had to vomit from the chemo therapy. \u00a0In the rush of vomit-must, she pushed an old man out of the way to get to the toilet. \u00a0Hah! \u00a0Everybody thought she was just a drunk party person, needing to puke after too much booze. \u00a0WE laugh and laugh whenever we recall her moxie. \u00a0She, by the way, is single\u2026 sort-of\u2026 Yet, she never let the lack of a steady man worthy of her exuberant beauty, stop her from enjoying life.<\/p>\n

34.) FORGIVE!\u00a0 Forgive everybody for everything.\u00a0 Bitter Bitch?\u00a0 No more.\u00a0 Now is time to LOVE and feel one with every nurse, every waiter, every human that comes and that may care for you if you OPEN your heart to loving everybody. \u00a0Yet, this doesn\u2019t mean that you forget that some people are toxic. \u00a0Let those people go and embrace the ones that love you NOW.<\/p>\n

35.) Don\u2019t forget.\u00a0 Let go of the waste.\u00a0 Say goodbye to human trash, vampires, and other nightmare friends that have sucked you dry for years.\u00a0 YOU know who I\u2019m talking about.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t matter who it is.\u00a0 IF a person consistently brings you down, bursts your bubble, crushes your mood, erase them from your world.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need a hairdresser that doesn\u2019t listen and has bad breath.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need a boyfriend who has a wife.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need to lie about yourself in order to look normal.\u00a0 Accept yourself.\u00a0 Love you.<\/p>\n

36.) Moreover, you may not have tons of money or be the best looking person on earth but you have value and your time is it.\u00a0 YOU have zero time to waste.\u00a0 You must focus your depleted energy wisely in order to make it from one day to the next.\u00a0 Cancer is a serious condition and minimizing it, is a strategy I employ.\u00a0 Yet, I\u2019ve never backed down or stepped away from treatment.\u00a0 I\u2019ve embraced life, thus finding strength that isn\u2019t mine, borrowing it from my husband, my friends, and the world… remembering that my drama is but a drop in the galactic sea of mystery.\u00a0 Enjoying the ups and down, of the eternal \u201cred-wine sea…\u201d<\/p>\n

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\u201cThe Nice Librarian,\u201d another selfie of Frau Kolb on the GO (notice the blur) during chemo in 2010<\/h6>\n

37.) Visit churches, landmarks, and museums.\u00a0 Enjoy the public spaces of your cities.\u00a0 The grand architecture or natural wonders of the world deserve your attention even if they are only around the corner.\u00a0 Take a bus to another part of town.\u00a0 Shake it UP!\u00a0 You don\u2019t have to be the version of yourself you have been thus far.\u00a0 Part of you will be forever changed by treatment and the new you is yours to chisel into the you,\u00a0you<\/em>\u00a0are now.<\/p>\n

38.) Allow the cancer to be a reason why you step into being your true self in public.\u00a0 It empowered Frau Kolb by forcing her to make time for creativity, art, and other sources of profound delight.\u00a0 (Prior to diagnosis, my role as California beach mom was all consuming and I was writing (on the edges of days), yet not painting (because I felt guilty over using materials\u00a0 without a financial return and making art requires lots of un-interrupted work time, which I did not have) When I got the diagnosis my world changed.\u00a0 Cancer can be a license to finally focus attention on loving yourself in order to make\u00a0ease-rich<\/em><\/strong>\u00a0(the opposite of dis-ease<\/em><\/strong>)choices.<\/p>\n

39.) In other words, make the cancer work for you.\u00a0 Yes, there are resources assigned and available to people undergoing cancer treatment.\u00a0 Just telling someone, that you have cancer, can make them cut you some slack.\u00a0 This is not a card I advise using frequently but when you must, whip it out with flourish and revel in the fact that there are many CANCER BENEFITS for you to enjoy. \u00a0(Yet, be aware that some people, the really mean ones, will not care that you have cancer and may try to use your illness and vulnerability, against you\u2026 so\u2026 be careful and mindful when revealing your private medical conditions.)<\/p>\n

40.) This is time… is a time for elemental being to flourish.\u00a0 When your looks are gone, erased, you must learn to paint on a happy face or… be a blank slate.\u00a0 Pick.\u00a0 Do.\u00a0 Make-up is said to boast the immune system.\u00a0 Don\u2019t neglect your basic hygiene.\u00a0 Taking time to brush your teeth and put on a pretty scarf or a big macho cow-boy hat which will make others laugh and question your identity… GOOD MOVE!<\/p>\n

41.) Ever wanted to meet someone famous\u2026 well, if you are terminal\u2026 you might consider addressing a request to their press\/public relations representatives and respectfully request a visit from\u2026 you are very likely to get what YOU want, now\u2026 Brad Pitt\u2026 David Bowie\u2026 or\u2026 Adele. \u00a0Watch out! \u00a0Because, you really have the power to pull powerful people IN by being beautiful despite the medical drama. \u00a0Use it.<\/p>\n

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(This is another selfie taken while undergoing chemotherapy in 2010)<\/h6>\n

42.) If you believe in heaven: make a list of all the people you look forward to feasting with in the afterlife.\u00a0 In heaven, I\u2019m convinced that, you can have dinner with Augustus, the ancient Roman Emperor, Ben Franklin, and Anna Nicole Smith, all together, at their prime, forever available, because in heaven YOU can be two places at once, I\u2019m certain of it\u2026 IF you like!\u00a0 If you don\u2019t believe, well make a list of who you would like to see if heaven were real and you will tickle (I swear) your grandmother\u2019s spirit when you list her.\u00a0 Go for it and feel the good vibes of every human you list, no matter how \u201clong-gone,\u201d kissing you and loving you no matter how vicious the pain or ugly the bruising\u2026 you have the long line of human fortitude to tap into. \u00a0Revel in the fact that you come from tough people and that tough people bite the dust, too.<\/p>\n

43.)\u00a0 Threshold states are FUN!\u00a0 What could be more exciting than being near death?\u00a0 You don\u2019t know when its coming but rest assured it will.\u00a0 If you can learn to enjoy this state you might just live forever.\u00a0 Hah!<\/p>\n

44.)\u00a0 Give some money, a dollar or two counts, to cancer research. \u00a0 Hardworking scientists give up their youths, studying, and learning so that they can create effective cancer medications for us. \u00a0Don\u2019t believe that cancer medications are anything less than miracles and every time you drink a pill down, bless the water.<\/p>\n

45.)\u00a0 Be aware that you are now capable of seeing through the \u201cveil of illusion,\u201d which covers day-to-day life.\u00a0 Be proud.\u00a0 You know that the wizard is wears no underwear behind the curtain six-miles-wide.\u00a0 We all suffer.\u00a0 Yet, how we wear our suffering distinguishes and ennobles the gracious ones.<\/p>\n

46.)\u00a0 Did you do something BAD, hurtful to someone, long ago… maybe?\u00a0 Write the victim of your misdeed, a letter, ask for forgiveness, mail it to yourself, and IF and only IF after reading it yourself and feeling it would make the person receiving it feel GOOD, then mail it to the injured party.\u00a0 Rest assured that accepting responsibility for the fact that we all hurt others, either on purpose or by \u201caccident,\u201d is a good thing for it allows us to shed the weight of unpaid energetic debts, of love and caring that was absent, when it is the mandate of life that we love, in order to be loved.<\/p>\n

Ok\u2026 Now you have 46 guidelines for feeling blessed rather than powerless\u2026 I write with the intention of providing you with a chuckle or, at least, 69 good reasons to laugh in the face of death, a useful fresh perspectives, and empowerment in these times of turmoil.<\/p>\n

Please take care and know that I am thinking of all the people out there; losing their ha\u00efr, having breasts amputated, or otherwise facing profound changes; in order to continue to embrace the bliss of breathing.<\/p>\n

Best Love,<\/p>\n

Frau Kolb<\/p>\n

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\u201cPowerful Selfie,\u201d at LACMA, 2010, here Frau Kolb is sporting her \u201cBritish House Wife Wig.\u201d Dig it? Cancer Blessings? How dare Frau Kolb suggest that the cancer might mean an end to your precious life is a blessing? Well, Frau Kolb is an expert on getting a kick out of whatever life throws up in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":803,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[22,26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-798","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cultural-commentary","category-health-spiritual-fitness"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/pinkiciclebud.jpg?fit=1280%2C960&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=798"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":805,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions\/805"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/803"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=798"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=798"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/talkinggrid.com\/dev\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=798"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}